People may find it odd, my sense of being actively partnered with my mother. In reality, it’s impossible not to feel a strong, tangible connection to Mom, gone these 17+ years! From the moment I was booted from the corporate world two weeks after her death, her presence was never far – – she always believed I was meant for something she could never describe.
Mom radiates through Dayle Friedman & Rachel Cowan & Mary Pipher & so many authors, thought leaders. Where I once got defensive when people found it strange that she’s so much a part of what I – we, John & I – do, now I celebrate it as time folding & unfolding, past present future gloriously jumbled.
Mom & I had a strained relationship. She was never able to put me on common footing with my sibs, was never okay asking of them what she did of me. Praise be that John understood it – better than I. When I grumbled to him my frustration over her putting me on a pedestal, he commented, “You want everyone on the same platform.” Am blessed to has a husband who sees into the heart far better than I.
It was because we BOTH – Mom & I – openly acknowledged our divisive issues that I still feel a woman-to-woman kinship to her & proudly acknowledge that she ~ born in 1910 ~ went far more out of her comfort zone to meet partway than I had to go out of mine.
My birth faith teaches that what we leave with those left behind are our loves, that they – not our body – form our eternal essence. Mom defined her great loves as God, faith, her O Best Beloved, children, family, friends, community, country. She loved being in as full a relationship with each as possible; even if one seemed occasionally distant, her striving to connect never failed.
Mom is a natural focus of my elders get writing. It would be a disservice to humanity to withhold what I learned from being her daughter sidekick goad. John & I were not blessed with our own children – – maybe one of the great purposes is to give the world my mother’s arm to lean on in these unsettled times.
Our two greatest partners in this work of engaging energizing empowering are glorious intangibles: Mom & the Universe. It’s easy for John & I to press forward without a net – – with those two having our backs, we cannot fail!