Took me 65 years to fully GET my predisposition to working in collaboration with others, that I work best in a small group setting. My problem is that so much in my first 50 years goes wildly against it.
Throughout their lives, Mom & Dad played well with others, so it would be natural to think I’d get the message. But from birth – middle age, the core messages I got were from my way more influential older sibs; #1 was that connection was for suckers, that collaboration leads to soul-deadening “group think” & a stultifying “herd” mentality.
It’s STILL a struggle for me to know which personal mechanics lead TO connection, which lead AWAY. When so many messed up things were presented & modeled as normal, it’s hard to get a handle on which ones do & which ones don’t. A lot of people aren’t raised in family cultures that nurture connection; count me among the unfortunates who, without realizing, went even further down the wrong road, were taught techniques that kept me separate unique alone – and distainful of anything more.
Here I am, at 65+, doing my best to get a crash course in collaboration as THE source of human power!
First, striving to get my mind heart spirit on the same page. The head catches on – no problem. But the heart was steeped for years in contempt for anything that might remotely resemble group collaboration – brushed off as a “herd mentality” that was to be shunned rather than nurtured. And if heart doesn’t get it, spirit will never buy in.
Am determined to get them in sync, but it’s HARD & I was raised in a family culture that aimed for comfort over challenge, process over product. Instead of buckling down, I’ve injected a sense of PLAY. Look at the problem as a TASK or even a challenge? No how, ho way! Am embracing pursuing collaboration skills as an adventure. How far up that once haze-hidden peak can I get over my remaining years? What are the tools & skills I need to learn the ins & outs & ’round abouts of connecting & collaborating? Find them, master them, APPLY them. Let those dynamics be simple, easy & fun to master!
Collaboration leads to POWer – I hear & follow its call!